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Parenting & Farm Kids:  Disadvantages of homeschooling??  |
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lovelady
True Blue Farmgirl
533 Posts
Toni
Indiana
USA
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 Posted - Aug 10 2009 : 2:04:04 PM
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My husband and I are in the very early stages of discussing homeschooling our kids. He isn't necessarily against it, but he has some reservations. I am not even positive it is for us, but I can't really see any reason not to. Neither one of us really knows anyone who has been home-schooled so we don't have anyone to use as an example and talk to about it. I read blogs of people who homeschool and know that many Farmgirls do, but we just don't have that much experience with it. So, the other night he asked me what the bad side to homeschooling would be, and I honestly told him I didn't know. I could imagine you would get a little stir-crazy once in a while having the kids around all the time, but other than that, I couldn't give a good example.
If we are going to be serious about this, we really need to hear both sides of it, not just go into it thinking it will be a piece of cake. Everyone usually talks about all the advantages and how much they like it, but I need the nitty-gritty, so to speak. What made you want to pull out your hair? Beat your head against the wall? Give up? What would you do differently? |
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JustAnAllAmericanGirl
Farmgirl in Training
14 Posts
Jamie
Raleigh
North Carolina
USA
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Posted - Aug 10 2009 : 2:44:08 PM
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I'm being very honest when I say that there really hasn't been what I would call a disadvantage or a bad side to homeschooling my son. I know some people do however, usually when dealing with large numbers of children, but in my case that just isn't so. To ask about the bad side of homeschooling is like asking about the bad side of parenting. Does everyday go perfectly and according to plan? No. Would you trade being a parent for anything in the world? No. Same for homeschooling. Maybe I feel this way because I have built into our homeschooling flexability and the permission to not be perfect, or on time.
I'm sorry my answer is so Polly Anna but it really is the truth. It is never perfect but it is what you make of it. And remember, homeschooling is not an all or nothing choice. If it doesn't work you can reenter the school system at any time. Good luck in making your decision, I'm sure you and your husband will do what is right for your children.
www.JustAnAllAmericanGirl.blogspot.com |
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1badmamawolf
True Blue Farmgirl
1021 Posts
Teresa
"Bent Fence Farms"
Ca
USA
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Posted - Aug 10 2009 : 2:52:25 PM
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Depending on where you live, do your kids have neighborhood kids to play with? If not , then they are missing out on socializing with others, and that can be damaging for many reasons, depending on age, i.e., learning to share, listening and obeying authority figures, learning about are social diversity, i.e., differant races, creeds and colors. Are you ready to spend 4-6 hrs per day, 5 days aweek, teaching, and ask your self, are you educated enough, and have the proper personality to school your kids. These are just some of the things I can think of off the top of my head. Good luck
"Treat the earth well, it was not given to you by your parents, it was loaned to you by your children" |
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Alee
True Blue Farmgirl
18165 Posts
Alee
Billings
MT Sister # 8
USA
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Posted - Aug 10 2009 : 2:53:41 PM
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I have seen homeschooling be a great sucess. You can tailor your teaching to your child's needs, spend more one on one time with them and explore a broader range of subjects more in depth that most public schools can and will. However, I have also seen some families that didn't really make an effort to socialize their children with other kids and I have seent that to be a big downfall. So I think homeschooling can be a great tool but I think that some sort of extra ciricular outside of the home actiivity is really great too!
Alee
Farmgirl Sister #8
www.awarmheart.com
www.farmgirlalee.blogspot.com
www.allergyjourneys.blogspot.com
Put your pin on the farmgirl map! www.farmgirlmap.blogspot.com |
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4HMom
True Blue Farmgirl
427 Posts
Kelly
Montana
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Posted - Aug 10 2009 : 5:31:48 PM
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My intention is not to offend anyone, but I have to put my two-cents worth in. I have been a professional educator for 20 years. I have a bachelors degree and a master's degree and I still don't feel that I could provide my kids with the best possible education. I don't believe anybody can be an expert at everything...my field is science and math. Maybe I take it personally that everybody thinks that they can teach...teaching is a profession, and I've worked hard to be the best teacher that I can be. Unfortunately, many people do not see teachers as professionals in the same light they see others with as much training (CPA, nurses, lawyers, etc.) I ask you this: If your child needed surgery, would you look it up on the internet and do it yourself? Like I said, I definately do NOT want to offend anybody, but I have seen too many times when kids come to public school and are so far behind in math and science, that they really struggle and the whole experience is miserable.
"Be the change you want to see in the world" -Gandhi |
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1badmamawolf
True Blue Farmgirl
1021 Posts
Teresa
"Bent Fence Farms"
Ca
USA
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Posted - Aug 10 2009 : 6:32:35 PM
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By the way, I did not home school, besides I don't think I could do a good enough job, I know my kids would have missed out on some very importent parts of life.I do not look down on any one that does, ( cause I know some that have done really well at teaching their kids), nor would I think any less of anyone that deceided that public/private school is good enough. I do not think the average parent is going to be able to give their kids the type of education that in todays world they need, and that would be an injustice in its self.
"Treat the earth well, it was not given to you by your parents, it was loaned to you by your children" |
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kmbrown
True Blue Farmgirl
437 Posts
Misty
Waynesboro
Pennsylvania
USA
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Posted - Aug 10 2009 : 6:42:49 PM
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You have to do what is right for your family. I guess because I was homeschooled and because I fully intend on doing the same with my children I found the above post highly offensive. All you have to do is look at the statistics provided and you'll actually find that homeschoolers generally are far ahead of those in a public education. Of course you have those who don't do as well...but neither side can generalize this.
The biggest downfall to homeschooling is more in high school. Sometimes it was frustrating with chemistry and biology to not have as many resources available to you as a school could offer.
No one is perfect or an expert at everything, but I do think a parent can educate their child far better than someone who knows the child for an entire whopping 9 months out of a school year. Each child learns differently, each child needs a different amount of time spent one on one with them, each child will struggle in different area's. A parent has the ability to work with each childs needs whereas a teacher with 12-20 students and a 40 minute class period cannot fulfill those needs.
Surgery is dealing with a life and death matter in a human and would also be illegal to perform unless you had the special training. Teaching your child will not kill either of you and is legal for good reason.
This is just my opinion just as the other posts are somebody elses opinion.
You and your husband must establish together what is right for you and your children. |
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1badmamawolf
True Blue Farmgirl
1021 Posts
Teresa
"Bent Fence Farms"
Ca
USA
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Posted - Aug 10 2009 : 7:44:33 PM
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Sorry Misty, I did not mean to be offensive to anyone personaly. We were asked for our opinions, and I gave mine. My daughter is a middle school math teacher, she also tutors high school students, and collage students, and is very good at what she does. She has not failed a student yet, cause she makes it easy and fun to learn, and I hope its always that way for her. She loved school and hated vacation time, she had straight A's all the way thru collage, she graduated with honors from every level. I would have never done her justice, nor would she have gotten the scholarships she did with home schooling. Like I said, what ever works for your kids. I can also say I would not have had the time that my kids needed for home schooling, and that also would be wrong. I live on and own and work full time a farm/ranch.
"Treat the earth well, it was not given to you by your parents, it was loaned to you by your children" |
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lovelady
True Blue Farmgirl
533 Posts
Toni
Indiana
USA
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Posted - Aug 11 2009 : 03:35:57 AM
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Thanks for all the opinions, Ladies! When I posted the question I had no intention of starting any disagreements, and I thank everyone for their input and for remaining civil despite the differences in opinions. I know that only my husband and I can make the decision on whether or not we should home school and I appreciate hearing everyone's reasoning for the decisions they made in their children's education.
My husband and I were both educated in public schools and I think we turned out just fine. We both have college degrees and good relationships with our families. But looking back, I can see many instances that being in a different environment instead of public schools would have been more beneficial. Hopefully I can find a home-school group near us so that I can learn more about the pros and cons and opportunities available. Thanks again! |
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lovelady
True Blue Farmgirl
533 Posts
Toni
Indiana
USA
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Posted - Aug 11 2009 : 05:56:56 AM
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OK, I have been thinking about this post this morning as I went about my chores and I wanted to clarify something. In my original post asking for opinions on disadvantages of homeschooling, I was not clear that what I was really looking for were opinions from people who have experience home schooling, and I apologize for that. I know of many, many reasons that home schooling is not the right option for a number of people, and really, a lot of those reasons make sense to me and concern me as well. What I really need is help in seeing the side of experienced home schoolers, and finding out what the downfalls or weaknesses of home schooling were from their perspective.
I think that Teresa and Kelly have very valid arguments in why they do not believe home schooling is the best form of education from their perspective and I really appreciate you sharing your concerns! |
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Tanna
True Blue Farmgirl
69 Posts
Tanna
Fort Worth
TX
USA
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Posted - Aug 11 2009 : 06:22:25 AM
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Toni,
I have been homeschooling all along. I really haven't seen any disadvantages. The worst thing about homeschooling is feeling like you have to justify yourself to others, sometimes complete strangers. I simply don't. I am not interested.
I love having my boys with me. I don't think of them as in the way. I also love being at home. When we do start to feel like we've been in the house too much we go out. The library is nice. They boys can look at books on their own and so can I. They know their way around a library. At our local library there is a checkers game set up and quite often one of my boys will be playing checkers with another child. So much for being unsocialized homeschoolers ;)
All the best with your decision. I'm sure you will do what is best for your family either way.
Tanna
Farmgirl #644
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4forMe
True Blue Farmgirl
131 Posts
Dawn
Easton
MD
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Posted - Aug 11 2009 : 08:34:40 AM
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I will offer what little bit of experience I had with homeschooling. In theory, I LOVE IT!! I agree with the above poster who said that statistics show that kids who homeschool learn far more than their schooled counterparts. I registered my oldest DS as a homeschooler when he was in the first grade. He loved being home with me and his younger sibs. I was pregnant at the time and suffered severe hyperemesis (hospitalized many times) through out the entire pregnancy. The sickness made me depressed and because I was so ill we were house bound and not much teaching on my part was happening. I had great fantasies about homeschooling, that we would take weekly trips to the library, zoo, ice skating whenever we wanted, etc. Had I known what I know now, I would have just taken those months off and started when I was feeling better. Pressure from unsupportive family members (especially my controlling mother) caused me to enter him into public school. I felt so defeated.
I always kept the option open and still do. If we have a reason to do it, I know that it is always an option. I am fascinated by people who homeschool. I wish I was of the mental capacity that I could homeschool and have it be the best option for my family. For instance, I am a home body and happy to stay home and not see people for long periods, since being in school, I have found that all of my kids are VERY social kids and love and need the constant interaction with their friends/peers. Therefore, they are happier at school than they would be at home with me. I know this isn't the case for all kids. Last school year my son started middle school and I was on high alert and watching for signs of unhappiness on his part. He LOVES middle school. I was worried about bullies, etc. While we did have a few experiences with bullies the school handled it to my satisfaction and my son never had a moment of not wanting to go to school. He truly loves it.
Another reason I don't do it, I am NOT organized. For instance, since school let out for the summer, my house is a disaster area, and I have great difficulty getting organized while my kids are under foot making more messes. I enjoy the company of my kids, but the messy house really causes me anxiety. I wish I could just let it go and not worry about it, because I know lots of homeschoolers and regular moms who function with a messy house. I can't function though and have struggled all summer with it.
If you want to do it, I say go for it. Only you and your DH can decide if it is right for your family. I admire homeschoolers so much because while my kids are in school, I miss them. But for the reasons I stated, they are happier at school and I am a happier mom having the time and peace to get things accomplished.
I hope this makes sense and is helpful.
Sewing, knitting, gardening mom of 4. |
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peapicker
True Blue Farmgirl
521 Posts
texas
USA
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Posted - Aug 11 2009 : 09:19:44 AM
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Toni, ( I apoligize, but this is very long)
I have waited to write on this post because I know it can cause some controversy. We have six children and four of them went to public school and the last two were homeschooled. I can only speak for the situation in our area as far as experience with public school and home school. When we began there was a major decision being made at the state capital here in Texas reguarding the legal rights and restrictions on homeschooling. Homeschoolers were very active and the state decided it was constitutional and the restrictions were to be limited. Prior to this decision there were actually children taken from their parents and put in foster care just because they homeschooled and the harrasment from school authorities could be relentless. To be honest the Homeschool Legal Defense was quite busy for years after this decision defending the rights of homeschool parents. This all took place nearly twenty years ago.
In my situation, I decided to homeschool because I had spent a good many years dealing with the middle and high school here in this area and each year it became harder to even have an honest conversation with anyone who would admit to having any authority at the schools. I was told all kinds of nonsense just to get me out of the office. To be honest, I had to go up there unannounced or the principal and vice principal would hide out so they wouldn't have to answer any questions. One of my children was handicapped and hearing impared. All of the details would be too much to put on here, but all four children had issues of some degree that needed some form of communication to exist. To be clear they all made good grades and were never in any real trouble, but I was an active parent and the school became somewhat hostile to too much parental involvement. With that said, the grade school that they went to was great , except for some federal mandated teaching that I did not agree with. The school would always talk to me and I felt like my kids were safe there and I was still their primary authority.
I decided to homeschool the last two because I did not want to loose them to the system of the public schools, where in our area the parental authority was being overrided majorly in the high school. They were really not learning much of anything, and the school had become a dangerous place to some and the school was pretty much just interested in their showing up so they could just collect the state and federal money.
I know there are great teachers out there. I know they spent money and time to learn their profession and I would not want to insult any of them. Some of them are even my friends. I feel like the schooling decision is stricly the parents decision and there is more than an "education" that fuels the fire of controvery. I think like most of the giants we have to combat in this society it goes back to control and money. School started out as communities wanting to educate their children so they could all read and write and do basic math. Now it is a furnace that has to be fueled and the kids are getting left out and parents that want to be heard have a hard time getting someone to listen to them. There seems to never be enough money for shcools and the waste of money is astounding at least in our area.
There are lots of resources out there now for homeschooling and it is a great time to experience it. I think there are successes and failures
in private school, public school and homeschool. So I think it would be unfair to assume that any of the three is either all bad or all good.
With all of that said to answer the original question......yes I had some hard days. I expected a lot of myself and got really tired sometimes.
I had one child that could take a book and read it an answer all the questions and pass a test with no problem. I had another that could read a book and couldn't tell you a thing that it said. I don't it would matter which or where they went to school , I think it was just the way God made them. Some days I worried about things like what would happen to my kids If I died or got sick and they had to go to public school, and would they be accepted (there is a stigma on homeschoolers in most places). I had family members that did not like it and would constantly ask them questions to see if they were up to snuff. I even left a church because my daughters sunday school teacher came to our house and told me she did not think it was a good idea and I felt like my daughter was being targeted in church. So there are some hurdles to get over. Now my two youngest are grown with families of their own and they are very well adapted adults. I would not have traded the experience of homeschooling for anything in the world. I was so close to my last two all of the way through the high school years and it created a very tight bond. But I have to say homeschooling is not for everyone. I have had many a friend tell me that they can't wait for school to start so they can get away from their kids for a while and they would go crazy if they had to be with them all day every day. But if your heart tells you to homeschool then I would say don't miss out on a blessing. In my experience there will be good days and bad days no matter where your children go to school.
Sharlet |
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FebruaryViolet
True Blue Farmgirl
1786 Posts
Jonni
Elsmere
Kentucky
USA
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Posted - Aug 11 2009 : 10:26:15 AM
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I do not homeschool, but have friends who do--and in that regard, I would say this: the children I know that are homeschooled are incredibly intelligent children...but, honestly, a little too sheltered. Could be that it's just the parents, but I think it's more that they interact with so few other children, unless it's kids at their church, who are also homeschooled and somewhat sheltered :).
I note that most of the prev. posts are about the "now" of homeschooling but what about later on in life? We actually just had a case where an otherwise exemplary officer lost his job (of 5 years) because his homeschooling diploma did not fall under the state guidelines of a "state acredited high school diploma or GED Equivalent". He was homeschooled by his mother, the "principal" and taught largely religious doctrine with the exception of math, as demonstrated on his transcripts (the bible as literature for a literature requirement, creationism for biology requirements). Homeschooling is regulated in Kentucky only to the extent that they have to pass an equivalency examination when graduating, and that you provide "open records" and send in a quarterly transcript of studies (all falling under the state guidelines of math, science/biology, reading/english, etc.). Because of the very distinct wording and requirements for state jobs, he was unable to continue working unless he got a GED equivalent. He chose not to, based on principal. It certainly made me rethink homeschooling as far as future job choices for my child. There are lots of state/county/city affiliated positions out there that have these same requirements.
Will employers eventually be forced to review and revise applications and employment contracts with homeschooling becoming more prevalent in our society? I believe so, but I don't think it will come anytime soon.
Musings from our family in the Bluegrass http://sweetvioletmae.blogspot.com/ |
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MagnoliaWhisper
True Blue Farmgirl
1006 Posts
Heather
Jamaica
NY
USA
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Posted - Aug 14 2009 : 2:39:24 PM
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Jonni, don't take this as a personal attack. I think your police officer should of been able to be a police officer regaurdless and understand his principle.
OTOH, you may not know this, but every state does have rules, and there is a website you can look up your states rules on. And it's up to each parent to make sure their cirr goes by their states laws. Also you can be sure you are going by your states laws, by simply public homeschooling. The public school system literally has a cirr you can get, directly from them for you to homeschool. And it's exactly as if they went to public school, but you did it at home.
http://www.heathersprairie.blogspot.com |
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FebruaryViolet
True Blue Farmgirl
1786 Posts
Jonni
Elsmere
Kentucky
USA
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Posted - Aug 17 2009 : 06:42:59 AM
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I don't at all, Heather. I think he should have been able to be, too. It's that "gray" area that can't be refuted in contracts that allowed him to be suspended.
Musings from our family in the Bluegrass http://sweetvioletmae.blogspot.com/ |
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Parenting & Farm Kids: Disadvantages of homeschooling?? |
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Disadvantages of homeschooling??
