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Family Matters:  Last words  |
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Cabin Dreamer
True Blue Farmgirl
54 Posts
Brenda
Cortland
NY
USA
54 Posts |
 Posted - Aug 15 2011 : 7:01:47 PM
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Call me crazy, but it has been just over 4 years since my father died. Tonight, I watched "how i met your mother" and one character lost his father and tried to remember his father's last words. I still cannot remember the last words I said to my father or the last words he said to me in person. I do remember that he left a voicemail on our answering machine wishing my husband and I a happy anniversary and to call him back. The next night he passed from a heart attack, while we were out of town, I never got to call him back. A flood of memories are coming to me tonight. I don't know why I am so emotional. That show hit a nerve big time. Has anyone else experienced this? I can't get to sleep, I just keep crying.
So much "woulda coulda shoulda" going on.
Farmgirl #1954 |
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farmmilkmama
True Blue Farmgirl
2027 Posts
Amy
Central MN
USA
2027 Posts |
Posted - Aug 15 2011 : 7:48:52 PM
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Sorry that you're having a rough time, Brenda. Isn't it amazing how things can come back like that after something hits a nerve? We will be thinking of you tonight and hoping you can find peace about this. There is always a shoulda, coulda, woulda, and you can drive yourself nuts about it! Hang in there, and I hope you're able to find some solace in the memories you do have. :)
--* FarmMilkMama *--
Farmgirl Sister #1086
Be yourself.
Everyone else is already taken.
-Oscar Wilde
www.farmfoodmama.blogspot.com
www.thehmmmschoolingmom.blogspot.com |
Edited by - farmmilkmama on Aug 15 2011 7:50:16 PM |
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mydakota
True Blue Farmgirl
152 Posts
kristi
redmond
oregon
USA
152 Posts |
Posted - Aug 16 2011 : 12:12:20 AM
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(((((hugs)))))
HearthCricket Farm. Where the door is always open, and the coffee is always on. |
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Cabin Dreamer
True Blue Farmgirl
54 Posts
Brenda
Cortland
NY
USA
54 Posts |
Posted - Aug 16 2011 : 02:32:42 AM
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Thanks Amy and Kristi. I guess a good old cry once in awhile can help. I finally got some sleep last night and now I am ready for a new day. I do have a lot of good memories with my father, I don't know why a simple television show affected me so much. Sorry to blubber on last night. Somehow it just seemed to help to reach out to my "sisters".
Farmgirl #1954 |
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farmmilkmama
True Blue Farmgirl
2027 Posts
Amy
Central MN
USA
2027 Posts |
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Tall Holly
True Blue Farmgirl
2305 Posts
Holly
Worcester
Vermont
USA
2305 Posts |
Posted - Aug 16 2011 : 5:33:28 PM
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I do not know the last words of my mother or my father what I do know is that my mother loved all of her children very much and I hold that close to me. My father loved us but had little to do with our upbringing. He worked. I think that if you know that your parents loved you and they knew that you loved them there is not much else to be said. I am remembering emotions and feelings more than words these days.
Holly
farmgirl #2499
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Penny Wise
True Blue Farmgirl
1903 Posts
Margo
Elyria
OH
USA
1903 Posts |
Posted - Aug 16 2011 : 7:22:12 PM
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sending hugs
Farmgirl # 2139
~*~ counting my pennies and biding my time; my dreams are adding up!~*~ |
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Bear5
True Blue Farmgirl
13055 Posts
Louisiana/Texas
USA
13055 Posts |
Posted - Aug 17 2011 : 9:53:44 PM
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Brenda:
Hugs to you. I think I know how you feel. My dad had to have a five way bypass. All six of his daughters were at the hospital. The doctors rolled him to surgery and said we could not go too far down the hall with him. We all, including me, gave him a quick kiss. I left immediately to go home and take a bath, etc... Little did I know, the doctor rushed back down the hall to tell my sisters that my dad wanted to talk to each one separately before the surgery. I never had the chance to chat with him because, as I said, I had left. In my heart, I know what my dad would have said to me, and I to him.
I hope you are feeling better today.
Marly
"It's only when we truly know and understand that we have a limited time on earth- and that we have no way of knowing when our time is up- that we will begin to live each day to the fullest, as if it was the only one we had." Elisabeth Kurler-Ross |
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Lieberkim
True Blue Farmgirl
839 Posts
Kimberly
Sunnyside
WASHINGTON
USA
839 Posts |
Posted - Aug 18 2011 : 12:45:07 AM
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Brenda,
No shame in tears they're cleansing. Obviously, you loved him very much and he you. Hope you are feeling better now.
Excuse the mess & the noise, my children are making happy memories |
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jpbluesky
True Blue Farmgirl
6066 Posts
Jeannie
Florida
USA
6066 Posts |
Posted - Aug 18 2011 : 01:17:19 AM
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I understand the "hitting a nerve" thing. Each year on Mother's Day, I am on the verge of tears all day long. I will not even realize it until something minor happens, and I begin to cry. Once it was in church, and I had to go out to the parking lot, because the tears would not stop. My hubby asked why I was crying, and I was honestly confused about it myself. After this Mother's Day cry happened for several years, it finally occurred to me that I missed my mom. She passed in 2003, and that day seems to "hit a nerve" for me without my even seeing it coming.
Farmgirl Sister # 31
www.blueskyjeannie.blogspot.com
Psalm 51: 10-13 |
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Alee
True Blue Farmgirl
22937 Posts
Alee
Worland
Wy
USA
22937 Posts |
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rough start farmgirl
True Blue Farmgirl
3331 Posts
marianne
The Beautiful Pacific NW
Washington State
USA
3331 Posts |
Posted - Aug 23 2011 : 03:37:30 AM
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Thank you all for sharing. I sometimes think I am crazy with how much I miss my folks. They passed within 8 months of one another - they never wanted to be apart! I just never thought they would still be a part of my daily thoughts 6 years after losing them. I know I will always miss them, but it is still so "fresh." Know what I mean?
My MJF sisters make me feel "normal" and understood!!
Marianne |
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marthajane
True Blue Farmgirl
196 Posts
Anna
Orlando
FL
USA
196 Posts |
Posted - Aug 29 2011 : 08:20:52 AM
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I can see this forum having the potential to be very theraputic. I know how to relate to your stories, stories of love and loss. The pain of loss we feel is the evidence of the love we shared and now seems 'gone'. I lost my dearest sister when I was 9 years old and theres always been a void where she would have been.
I guess on some level the love that we are blessed with comes with a cost. And the losses that we suffer, teach us to carry our own burdens. Which really is a very valuable lesson, bc everyone has their own and maybe needs help too. It would be unfair to burden someone who may have a heavy burden already.
Im glad none of us mind hearing about these sorrows.
Smiles and Rainbows brighten the day!
Happiness IS being a MoM |
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marthajane
True Blue Farmgirl
196 Posts
Anna
Orlando
FL
USA
196 Posts |
Posted - Aug 29 2011 : 08:40:35 AM
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I can see this forum having the potential to be very theraputic. I know how to relate to your stories, stories of love and loss. The pain of loss we feel is the evidence of the love we shared and now seems 'gone'. I lost my dearest sister when I was 9 years old and theres always been a void where she would have been.
I guess on some level the love that we are blessed with comes with a cost. And the losses that we suffer, teach us to carry our own burdens. Which really is a very valuable lesson, bc everyone has their own and maybe needs help too. It would be unfair to burden someone who may have a heavy burden already.
Im glad none of us mind hearing about these sorrows.
Smiles and Rainbows brighten the day!
Happiness IS being a MoM |
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Family Matters: Last words |
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Last words
