| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| RueAnn |
Posted - Dec 31 2010 : 09:24:47 AM
I recently found out I'm pregnant with my second child. While my husband and I are excited mostly we're just scared and overwhelmed (and I have really bad morning sickness which doesn't help!) We are quite poor, living in a one bedroom apt. (which we just moved into after living in a motel for several months.) We moved to Ohio to be close to my husband's family but they don't have much to do with us, which makes me sad for my daughter's and husband's sakes. We keep hoping one day we will have a farm, but it feels so far away it makes me feel like it's an impossible dream. While I'm grateful my husband recently found a job, he does not get more than a few hours a week, and it feels like we spend more on gas just getting him to and from work. I feel like nothing is working out in Ohio for us, we had rough times before moving here, but it's been really bad recently. We have no support structure here, so I'm hoping to find some help and hope among farmgirls.
Please send your positive thoughts and any advice you have for how you've gotten through rough spots. I'm terrified we won't be able to support our growing family and that we'll never find a farm and have chickens again. It sounds silly to most people, but we can't imagine a future that doesn't include a garden and chicken coop in it. |
| 25 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| prayin granny |
Posted - Feb 02 2011 : 3:05:50 PM
Tracy,
I was a single mom, raised my 4 kids from the youngest being 2 to the oldest being 7. There were some REALLY tough and lean times. Life does have a way of eventually geting better. Look into food programs where you live, the surplus govt food program at the beginning of the month. Perhaps food stamps, food pantries, etc. There is also a program in most states where you pay I think 20 to 30 dollars for a box of food that feeds a family of 4 for a week. I think it has been mentioned in the MJF forums. I will try to find the name and website for you.
These are rough times for so many. We have family members, friends, and many farmgirl friends that are in tougher than usual times as well.
Take care and thoughts and prayers coming your way. You will find encouragemetn and a support system with these ladies! They are wonderful here!
Blessings, Linda
www.scatteredlittleblessings.blogspot.com |
| countrymommy85 |
Posted - Feb 01 2011 : 1:53:10 PM
We just started renting a farm house after living in a one bedroom trailer for 2 years... We had the 2 kids together in the bedroom because I couldn't sleep if baby #2 woke up and our bed was in the "living room". It was really tough, I couldn't take care of our animals because I had such bad morning sickness with #2 so I know where you are coming from! It was hard for me because my friends were all getting married and moving away too so I was left with only my inlaws and hubby! Now that we moved we are having a difficult month, but tough times come and go, its all part of the ride of life. Even if you can't see the end of the tunnel its coming :) I was really negative when I was pregnant because of how sick I was so I like to say I looked at the sides of the tunnel instead of looking ahead for the end :) I'm not saying that is what you were doing I'm just saying that is what I did! I know you can make it through! Cling to your growing family and enjoy the good days because it will make the bad days not seem so bad :) Praying for you!
~We can make the world a better place for our kids and future generations by what we do today!~ |
| pnickols |
Posted - Jan 27 2011 : 3:20:10 PM
Tracy, so glad you are starting to feel better ! |
| vmfein |
Posted - Jan 27 2011 : 11:37:27 AM
I am glad that things are looking up for you. I know how you feel about missing your family. Except for my husband the rest of mine is all in Iowa. I see them once or twice a year. Over the years it has gotten better. I do a lot of crafts for my family. I especially write to them as well since it is cheaper and makes their day in getting something in the mail. The quilt guild I belong to sometimes gives out free fabric. Another way to meet people besides what others have said is the local library, sometimes they have classes there. When days that I know will be very busy or I am feeling unwell I cook a homemade meal in a slow cooker. It is a easy way to get a homemade meal. |
| RueAnn |
Posted - Jan 27 2011 : 10:19:18 AM
Hi everyone! The morning sickness is subsiding- hooray! It's such a joy to be able to eat some food again. I'm back in physical therapy, so with some work and luck I'm hoping I won't end up in a wheelchair with this pregnancy like I did the last. I heard the baby's heartbeat at the last midwife visit, and was told he/she is very active! It's a miracle to hear the heartbeat for the first time!
To all of you who have offered friendship and phone calls, thank you. I'm really shy and have Seasonal Affective Disorder on top of everything else, so I've not been up to chatting in person. I appreciate knowing you're out there, but am having a hard time breaking out of my shell. |
| Lindsay C |
Posted - Jan 23 2011 : 09:14:54 AM
WIC is a great program to help you out. I am a neonatal nurse and at our hospital we have a "Best Start" program that helps make sure you have all the prenatal care you need and gives you information on getting any assistance that you might require. We also have a car seat program through the Head Injury Foundation that gives out free car seats to moms. I'm sure that every state has some programs like these. You could call around and check. I know some hospitals also offer support groups for pregnant women and new moms. You may find some other moms in the same position who could also benefit from some mutual encouragement.
I had terrible morning sickness with my pregnancy! I definitely remember days when I lay on my couch eating cheerios and that was all I accomplished for the day. :) It gets better. I'll be thinking about you.
Lindsay
Farmgirl Sister #1452 |
| knittinchick |
Posted - Jan 22 2011 : 5:55:23 PM
Tracy, I am sending prayers your ways that there will be a brighter tomorrow. If you need anything, please email me! I hope for you a better future and a very healthy second baby.
God's and Farmgirl's Blessings,
Megan aka Loretta Rae
At heart, I am both a sassy city girl and a down-home country gal.
The dictionary is the only place where success comes before work. |
| earthmamaT |
Posted - Jan 21 2011 : 8:05:00 PM
Tracy you are in my thoughts and we are sending light and love your way. I have been through what you are going through. I agree with what many of these wise farmgirls are telling you ~ this too shall pass. BUT while you are in the midst of it, it is hard to see the light at the end of a long dark tunnel. I can remember working graveyard shift with 5 children at home. One of them was only 2 months old. I did graveyard my husband worked days. We did this for 6 months to get ahead. I was exhausted all the time ( sleeping during the day with a 2 month old and a 4 year old doesn't work), but we made it through. That is really the bottom line. YOU WILL MAKE IT THROUGH THIS!
As for the morning sickness I can tell you my middle daughter had all day sickness. She lost 15 lbs in the first 4 months. She had a beautiful baby boy that weighed 7lbs 12oz. I made her an herbal tea that she used. Since she could not keep tea down the only way she could take it was to make ice cubes from the tea and suck on them. Try this with peppermint tea. It helps calm the tummy.The other thing is ginger syrup ( I posted the recipe over on the herbal page). Please keep all of us posted!
Tammy ~
"Be the change you want to see in the world" Gandhi |
| eggfarmgirl |
Posted - Jan 20 2011 : 9:33:15 PM
Bless your heart ! You are still in my prayers. Know you are thought of and prayed for daily. I too was down and out when we found out my Husband had Mesothelioma. He had to stop working after his first surgery,when they diagnosed him. I have not worked for several years due to my own disabilities. So we were down,broke as we had so many out of pocket expenses right away. I am so grateful to our church. They have an awesome food bank going that now serves county wide. They stepped in and brought food to us when we could not get out. After we got back on our feet I would donate to the food bank and volunteer to check people in or help with records. My parents always said we should bless up when given the chance. What I mean is if we are down and out and receive help we may not be able to repay that exact person or group, but somewhere down the road you will be able to help another. I guess what I am getting at is...you are not alone sister. Reach out where you can. God will show you the way !!!
Hugs,prayers and many blessings...
Hugs...Kristy
"Live like you were dyin'"
Sis #2339
Scattered Prairie Gals Chapter
http://www.myhealingthroughartstory.blogspot.com
My studio Blog- http://www.lostcreekstudio.blogspot.com |
| momdrinkstea |
Posted - Jan 20 2011 : 6:39:55 PM
Tracy,
I agree with the suggestion to keep eating! Even if it's just 2 crackers, every hour,
a little bit in your stomach all the time will curb the nausea. I lived on saltines!
I've been where you are...hubby lost his job, I went out and worked since he couldn't
find work and got pregnant, already had 2 kids, we were broke!
We'd moved, so had trouble qualifying for food stamps/assistance.
WIC and Salvation Army got us food, and kept us going until things got better.
We still donate food to Sally Army as a thank you.
Churches will definitely help, just talk to a pastor, they can guide you when you don't
know the area well, and put you in touch with people/places for help.
And I have the garden and chickens now! You will too! :)
Look at the good in your life, focus on that. This will pass,
it will only get better. You'll see!
Sending prayers your way, with love!
-Elizabeth
Stacked Stone Farm
feel free to follow my blog: www.stackedstonefarm.blogspot.com |
| pnickols |
Posted - Jan 09 2011 : 3:49:49 PM
Tracy,
I just read your post, look I am so close to you if you want to meet or talk just let me know if I can be of any help, Parma is just stone's throw from BrookPark, really. I will email you. hang in there |
| treelady |
Posted - Jan 08 2011 : 11:21:36 AM
Tracy,
My daughter went through horrible all-day sickness with both her babies and lost more weight in the first 4 months than she gained the entire time. But both babies were healthy and normal, so don't get to worried yet. Your in my prayers and thoughts daily. Things will get better.
Julie
With the new day comes new strength and new thoughts. |
| longbeachfox |
Posted - Jan 08 2011 : 10:48:20 AM
Dear Tracy...
My dear neighbor told me once that "this, too, will pass" and it does. I know it may not seem like it now. My husband and I came home from Montana with $1.53 and no job to come back to.
One thing I would like to encourage you with is that God is a provider and will provide. Put your trust in Him and sincerely pray about your situation. He is there 24-7 to listen.
In your area check out to see if there is a local food bank or gleaners. Most churches have a food pantry or can supply some help. Often there are organizations that can help you with winter heat. You sound like you can be eligible for food stamps also.
Get yourself to a church tomorrow morning and just listen to what God has in store for you.
God listens to our hearts...even when we don't say it out loud. I just know you will have your chickens again. I always loved having chickens too!
God bless your day dear one.
Mary
With God...Nothing Is Impossible!
http://foxontherunarts.blogspot.com
www.etsy.com/shop/longbeachfox
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| msdoolittle |
Posted - Jan 07 2011 : 9:06:49 PM
Bless your heart! Most all of my friends lost weight the first trimester. I didn't only because I never was nauseated. I should also tell you (and you may already know) that if at all possible, do try to keep eating even when you feel terrible. (haha, yeah right, huh?) I have had a couple of friends who did were violently ill in the first trimester and just didn't eat. It only made the nausea worse. With their second child, they forced themselves to eat and it went a LOT better. I also had another friend who had to be on Zofran the entire pregnancy or she'd 'toss cookies'. Bleech. Hope your hormones even out soon.
As I was reading my new MJF mag today, I was reminded of Angel Food Ministries. We went through a pretty rough patch last year and I heard about this program through some friends. It is done through local churches and you get a lot of food for a good price. It is really just a big food co-op essentially. There is NO eligibility requirements or anything like that. ANYONE can participate.
While some of the food was more processed than I'd have liked, it still SURE made a difference on my monthly budget. I really loved the fruit and veggie box :0) http://www.angelfoodministries.com/
Will send out a prayer for you! Sorry you feel so sick :0(
FarmGirl #1390
www.mylittlecountry.wordpress.com |
| Mommyswanson |
Posted - Jan 07 2011 : 09:52:22 AM
Tracy, praying for you & your family. This of course is a stressful & scary time. Glad you have WIC it is a good program, a friend of mine works for their department in our area. A support system is so important for all of you, especially after moving to a new area. May I suggest you keep trying to find that church family that can be there for you. When my husband & I were looking for a new church home we searched for many months spending many Sundays in worship at places that weren't the right fit. We were lucky & found the place God had planned for us. But, you don't need a church to pray. God is listening whenever you speak with him. There are many wonderful bible studies out there & many are free online that tackle the topics that weigh upon you right now. Please look into them. If you don't have a bible please let me know & if you'd like I could send you one. Big hugs!!
Laura
"That which does not kill us makes us strong!" "I cast all my cares upon you Lord." |
| RueAnn |
Posted - Jan 07 2011 : 09:35:25 AM
Thanks for checking in! I'm still wretchedly ill- found out at my midwife appointment I'm losing weight instead of gaining, but hope that will change after this trimester is over. My four-year old helps where she can, and puts up with me collapsing on the bed several times a day! I'm trying to take it day by day, moment by moment, and find comfort in all your prayers and well wishes. |
| sherrye |
Posted - Jan 07 2011 : 07:22:41 AM
tracy checking in on you? how have the last few days been like? hope you can see the day light. sending love and support. even when we dont know Jah through a church he still loves you. so i shall ask for some love and support for you. sherrye
the learn as we go silk purse farm
farm girl #1014
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| msdoolittle |
Posted - Jan 06 2011 : 9:17:49 PM
Thinking of you today, Tracy.
When I was pregnant with my first, I qualified for WIC and for the medical assistance. My baby was born 2 months premature and it was a very hard time for me. But all you can do is take things a day at a time. There is certainly no shame in asking for help when you really need it.
One day you will have your garden and chickens. That was my dream, too...it isn't silly at all! I have had a small garden everywhere I have lived. Even if it was just some morning glories and a few potted plants. It is still inspiring. :0)
One day at a time, girl! You will make it.
FarmGirl #1390
www.mylittlecountry.wordpress.com |
| graciegreeneyes |
Posted - Jan 03 2011 : 09:04:32 AM
hey if you get the dishes done and dinner on the table that IS a good day - just take things one day at a time. How old is your daughter? Is she old enough to be able to "help"? I know my son loved to have chores to help out when he was little - it kept him busy and as long as I relaxed my standards a bit it actually helped me out. Thinking of you,
Amy Grace
Farmgirl #224
"use it up, wear it out, make it do, or do without"
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| RueAnn |
Posted - Jan 03 2011 : 07:51:10 AM
Hello lovely ladies! Thank you all for your kind words and encouragement. While I know this is not the end of the world I've just been feeling so alone, so thanks for helping me feel less isolated.
To update, we're signed up for WIC, which is a great help, I'm waiting to see if we qualify for Ohio's state covered prenatal and child health insurance, and tomorrow I have an appointment with a midwife to see what her sliding scale fees are for prenatal care, labor, and delivery.
My husband has a job as a carpet cleaner, which we are grateful for, but yes, he needs more hours, or a second job. I am on disability due to mild cerebral palsy and often feel frustrated that I can't go out and get a job, but when I've tried it just causes me more pain than it's worth!
We're not really religious, though I appreciate the support structure and friendship a church offers it's members and community. We tried one church here and did not fit in, but may try again soon.
I agree that it feels better being proactive, but it is so hard with the morning sickness being so bad! I count it as a good day when I get dishes done and a homemade meal on the table.
I am very grateful to all of you for helping me keep things in perspective. We moved from Arizona where all my family is, and it's been rough adjusting to a new place. I am so glad I found this group of like minded, strong, kind women. Thank you! |
| highlandviewpantry |
Posted - Jan 02 2011 : 09:34:14 AM
Offering prayers for you and your family. There are several places I can think of that you could get money saving advice - a book called The Tightwad Gazette and a web-site called www.thehillbillyhousewife.com. Contact a local church for support. As far as the rejection from his side of the family - people who reject others are trying to absolve themselves of wrongdoing. Maybe they feel guilty about not helping you more or maybe it is something else. What does your husband do for a living - maybe someone can help out word of mouth?
www.thehighlandviewpantry.blogspot.com |
| graciegreeneyes |
Posted - Jan 02 2011 : 09:29:37 AM
Tracy - just remember everything is temporary. That is the hardest thing to do but things that seem endless at the time do change eventually. You and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers - is there somewhere else you have a larger support system? Just remember the farmgirls are always here - wish I was closer to a lot of you!!
Amy Grace
Farmgirl #224
"use it up, wear it out, make it do, or do without"
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| classygram |
Posted - Jan 02 2011 : 08:38:11 AM
Tracy my DH and I have been unemployed for a year. I know it must be very hard for you with one little one and another on the way. Two precious blessing have be given to you. The Lord is right there with you and will provide. All the suggestions above are great ones to check into. When we were first without any income, we too were scared. But we were led to those who could help. You and your family are in my prayers and sending big hugs, Brenda
http:///www.scatteredlittleblessings.blogspot.com
Seek reasons to Love..In every sigment of everyday-look for something that brings forth within you a feeling of Love-Abraham Hicks |
| Alee |
Posted - Jan 02 2011 : 07:44:26 AM
Tracy I hope things get better for you soon. I went through a time of being so poor that we didn't have grocery money and I had to go on food stamps. It took a while for me to get over the huge mountain of my pride but once I did, it was such a blessing. I remember that we were down to one can of green beans and some noodles in the house. I had a turkey that I bought on sale about a month before and I think some potatoes so I cooked everything we had and that was what had been getting us through that week. I had recieved my card that the foods stamps went on to but had not gotten any money on them yet. I remember checking the website right at midnight when I was supposed to get my money and it appeared! I went right to the store and filled a cart. It was amazing to be able to fill the cupboards and was such a relief I about started to cry. I stayed on food stamps for the initial 6 months before re-evaluation and decided we were doing well enough to not get re-evaluated. By then my work had picked up and things were really doing much better.
When I was pregnant with Nora I got on WIC. And I believe children under 5 can be on it too. I got so much food! I couldn't eat it all so some of my wic checks got wasted. But we always had plenty of milk and cereal, eggs and cheese. They also let you get juice and a few other things if memory serves right.
If nothing else, I recommend WIC so that is one less expense you have to worry about.
I know that jobs are scarce right now but don't loose hope! Did you know there is a statewide job search? Sometimes companies only list with them as they do a bit of prescreening for companies if they wish. I would recommend your husband to look there. And is there anyway he could carpool with someone to save on gas?
Also I know I little one can be a stress, but try to get health insurance from the state if you can so that your prenatal is covered as well as the birth.
We couldn't really afford a child when Nora came along so I made cloth diapers and was given or found diaper covers at local thrift shops. It was amazing how much money we saved. I can look through my things and see if I have any diapers left and I have a lot of material upstairs. If you would like some cloth diapers I could see if I could make some more.
Please don't lose hope!
*hugs*
Alee
Farmgirl Sister #8
www.farmgirlalee.blogspot.com
www.allergyjourneys.blogspot.com
Put your pin on the farmgirl map! www.farmgirlmap.blogspot.com |
| sherrye |
Posted - Jan 02 2011 : 06:18:40 AM
tracy how are you today? it can be so hard and feel so dark when we are sick and broke. both are temporary. one thing is for sure it will change. sometimes we need to just breathe. for me it was the waiting for the change that was hard. as others have said we have all been poor for awhile. i agree go to the food banks get food stamps. ask for help. check churches for assistance. lisa who helps me here was even given gas money from food stamp place. she had assistance with her electric. here we use the number 211 on phone to find services that can help. maybe there is something like that where you are. i know when i get proactive i feel i am doing something to change my situation. it helps my attitude. hang in there and know all these farmgirl brains are out there supporting you and coming up with ideas for you. sending you hugs and a prayer for peace through this tough time. sherrye
the learn as we go silk purse farm
farm girl #1014
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