| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| Heartbroken farmgirl |
Posted - Feb 23 2011 : 08:46:03 AM
Just under a year ago, a closed up church was opened up by a wonderful pastor and his wife. They are truely special, wonderful people. A month after they opened the doors, a couple on the edge of divorce, the wife suicidal, walked in to an adult congregation if 6 adults, five children, and two infants. A special message was delivered to the struggling couple, specifically about their struggles that saved a life, marriage, and a family.
It has been almost a year. In not having a congregation, the different offices have been filled with family members of the pastor. Makes sense if there is no one rowe to fill the position, but as time has come and people have come, there were others available. We have even lost out PCAG sponsor churches, 3 OF THEM!
Our youth pastor had a foul mouth, a new Christian struggling in his walk. He is one of the pastor's son-in-laws, and has been asked to step down. Pastor told me he was afraid to ask his family to step down, because they were all new Christians, and he is afraid they will just stop going. As a parent, I understand. In his being a pastor, there is a lack of wisdom here. (fears were warranted, he, his wife, the children's church leader, and their three kids no longer go to our church, or any other) while that is sad, as the mother of one teen, and three jrs, these are not people I wanted spiritually guiding my children... pastor has two more of his children and their spouses in office as well. It is literally a family business.
I have talked to visitors, who will not return due to family being in EVERY office. I have talked to countless visitors, who say they will not return due to how bad the music is. Pastors oldest daughter is the worship leader. She is sweet, but CAN NOT SING. At running the edge of unkind, I'll say she couldn't carry a tune in a bucket. We have had two wonderful singers resign, and leave the church. We have had a drummer, a bass player and TWO pianist leave as well. When I called to ask why, the answer is always the same. The music is so bad, its embarrassing. The pastors family is tone deaf. They don't hear it. I sing. I used to sing Competitively. I won, a lot. I am on the worship team, but, it doesn't really help as my mic is at 3, and daddy turns daughter up to an overwhelming 9. Remember its a tiny church with 6-8 bodies in the room. We can't keep people. I am starving for a worship service where the music is uplifting and full of praise, not frustrating.
I know this is long, and I'm sorry. I often think of finding another church, but as I am the wife who found her Saviour and life renewed in these walls, I hate to give up my little church with the bell in the steeple. Please pray for our little church. Pray for wisdom, and that God will bring people in. We have even lost two retired pastors, who chose to bow out as apposed to trying to advise pastor about how things are being run.
This is God's house. He can implement the solutions and the wisdom needed to have this precious place run correctly.
The tears I shed then, watered the flowers I harvest now.
www.broken908.blogspot.com
http://forums.familyfriendpoems.com/broken908
"The aim of education is the knowledge not of facts but of values."-Dean William Ralph Inge |
| 8 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| FieldsofThyme |
Posted - Mar 01 2011 : 2:33:08 PM
Will be adding prayers too.
Farmgirl #800
http://momzonetakingtimeformom.blogspot.com/
http://scrapreusedandrecycledartprojects.blogspot.com/
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| buffypuff |
Posted - Mar 01 2011 : 10:01:55 AM
Annette, this may be already done or considered, but is there a board? Is there a way in which the church's policy be that some of the offices be limited to several years etc. And I understand your predicament as far as the pastor and wife reaching out to you...maybe seeing you and your husband as a life line. If they are asking for friendship, then maybe that is what you should be and tell them the truth. God may...???...be asking you to stand in the gap for this little church. I can understand the pastor not wanting to remove his son-in-law from the youth position, but that is a decision made out of not trusting God about situations. Remember Eli the priest in 1 Samuel? He had 2 sons who ate the sacrifices to God, did not serve God and Eli did nothing. God punished Eli for that. Please read that. It may give you some hints. What happened in those lives is one reason relatives should not be in the same ministry without non-family being in a supervisory place. I remember someone telling me years ago that God does not have grandchildren...only children. It is not your pastor's responsibility to see to it that his sil stays in line by affecting other people with his mouth. God can and will deal with all His children. Sometimes we just don't know how to let go and let God. Will be praying for you and your decisions. I love the ending of your post.."the tears I shed then, watered the flowers I harvest now. That may be what God is doing right there for your church!
Buffypuff/ Claudia ~ Farmgirl & Sister #870 ~
"It compliments God to ask great things of Him." ~ St. Theresa of Avila
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| Heartbroken farmgirl |
Posted - Mar 01 2011 : 08:45:01 AM
We were sponsored by two PCAG churches, and one new Pentecost church. Last month we lost all three PCAG churches. I know this is bad. I know there is too much trouble here to be even considered. My parents are directors for the Gideons. My parents visited, and instead of asking to speak, my dad went home and prayed about gritting a letter to A.G. he chose not to, and THEN, my mother shared this. My bond with the building is slight. I declined signing the worship team contract. The day before Christmas, I told my family we needed to find another church. Two hours later, we had a surprise visit from pastor and his wife. They came with gifts. We had given their grandchildren all gifts, but this was very different. Among the other gifts, was a jewelry box. When I opened it, there was a necklace. The pendant was a white gold key. As I looked up, quite surprised by this lavish gift, they were crying. My pastors wife said "when we pastored years ago in Stockton, we became very close to a few families. Something happened, and there was a fall out. We promised ourselves, while loving the congregation as a whole, we would never allow ourselves to get so close to another family. You and your family were the *key* to opening our hearts again. We love you so deeply." Since that day, they have introduced myself and hubby as their *kids*, and my four children as theirs as well.
My heart aches. I am an extremely loving, "lock-jaw" committed person, by nature. The few problems I mentioned in the above post are only *some* of our issues. But to set my mind to leaving, and to explain why and actually do it, I fall to pieces. I know its a personal decision, affecting spiritual decisions, but I try to set my resolve, my husband is in complete agreence, but when it cones down to taking the step, we break...
Please continue to pray for us, and the tiny church, there are two new Christian, very young families there as well. Any damage that can be done there, will effect them the most.
The tears I shed then, watered the flowers I harvest now.
www.broken908.blogspot.com
http://forums.familyfriendpoems.com/broken908
"The aim of education is the knowledge not of facts but of values."-Dean William Ralph Inge |
| staci860 |
Posted - Mar 01 2011 : 07:52:10 AM
Hi Annette,
Is your church affiliated in anyway with a main stream denomination? How is it financially supported? Having to answer to someone higher and/or having funding cut may be one avenue to see changes. I agree that it is supposed to be God's house but in reality it is just a building being controlled by men. I admire and understand your desire to make it work and keep it alive but without serious change, more harm may be done in God's name than help.
I know it may be extremely difficult but the best thing for you and your family may be to move on to a church that feeds your spirits, lifts you up and allows you to use your gifts in His service.
I will pray for you and the church but God may not want hurting people to come into a situation that may wound them more. Please consider that, too.
I've worked for my church for over 10 years now and have walked through difficult circumstances, too. I know it's hard. If you want to email chat a bit more, I'll be available through the forum...
Blessings, staci FG# 973
:o )
Joshua 24:15 - ...choose this day whom you will serve,...as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.
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| prayin granny |
Posted - Feb 26 2011 : 5:59:49 PM
Such a tough situation, will be praying!
Blessings, Linda
www.scatteredlittleblessings.blogspot.com
Country at Heart |
| maggie14 |
Posted - Feb 23 2011 : 8:41:51 PM
Let me know if I can do anything else! :) I'm only an e-mail away. :)
Hugs,
Hannah
Farmgirl sister #1219
Lifes not about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away.
Just a small town country girl, farmgirl,loggergirl, trying to live her dreams. :)
P.s. I've been playing around with the spelling of my name ( weird I know) and I've decided that I will stick with Hannah for good. Sorry I got you all confused. Hugs!! |
| Heartbroken farmgirl |
Posted - Feb 23 2011 : 11:16:11 AM
Hannah, thank you.(((hugs))) right back your way.
The tears I shed then, watered the flowers I harvest now.
www.broken908.blogspot.com
http://forums.familyfriendpoems.com/broken908
"The aim of education is the knowledge not of facts but of values."-Dean William Ralph Inge |
| maggie14 |
Posted - Feb 23 2011 : 10:07:10 AM
Prayers sent Annette! *Hugs!*
Hannah
Farmgirl sister #1219
Lifes not about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away.
Just a small town country girl, farmgirl,loggergirl, trying to live her dreams. :)
P.s. I've been playing around with the spelling of my name ( weird I know) and I've decided that I will stick with Hannah for good. Sorry I got you all confused. Hugs!! |
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