| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| Ninibini |
Posted - Dec 21 2014 : 7:50:35 PM
FINAL UPDATE: 122814:
'Just want to let you all know that my Dad passed away a little while ago. I don't have any details. Guess we'll know more in the morning. Thanks to all of you for your prayers and kindness during all of this. It has been a long haul. I pray so deeply that he is now at peace at Home with the Lord. Much love to you all. God bless us, every one!
Hugs -
Nini
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UPDATE: 122614:
Yesterday our Energizer Bunny dad seemed to make a miraculous improvement, but this morning he has taken a turn for the worse. They have now removed all machines, with the exception of an oxygen mask. They are administering comfort measures, but his body is extremely weak and failing. It is just a matter of time. As my brother said, it could take hours or days, we have no way of really knowing. My stepmother is a mess emotionally, but thankfully she is rebounding well from her slight stroke. She is supposed to be undergoing physical therapy, but just can't bring herself to do it now, which, of course is understandable. The rest of us are doing well, just waiting and praying for him.
Thank you so much for your prayers and kind words. I'm okay, really. I just really hope for prayer for my dad.
Love and hugs -
Nini
____________________________________
UPDATE 122314:
Hi girls. They tried removing the vent today. Dad opened his eyes but was unresponsive. Then he started trembling so badly that they reintroduced the sedation medicine and reactivated the vent. They are going to wait until Friday to remove the vent (per my stepmother's wishes). At that time, they will let nature take its course. They do not believe his lungs and heart are strong enough to sustain him, so it will only be a matter of time before he goes Home. Please, please, PLEASE pray that this will be a peaceful passing for him. And please also pray for my stepmother. Dad requested not to have a funeral, so they are just taking him to a National Guard Cemetery (I think that's what my brother said - sorry!), and then they will say a few words before he is interred. As far as I know, the family is not expected to gather together. My stepmother is honoring all his wishes. I just feel so, so badly for her.
I'm okay, really. I have great peace about it - that peace that surpasses all understanding. It must be due, in great part, due to all the prayers you have been sending up. Thank you so, so much. God bless you. :)
Much love,
Nini
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UPDATE 122214:
Eghads and little fish hooks...So my brother spoke with the hospital. They decided NOT to take Dad off the vent today because he is too weak. The nurse told my brother that my dad's lungs are "shot." He said she was very curt with him and abrasive, so he didn't talk with her long. I am very, very, VERY upset. I do not understand... If he expressly refused all treatment, and if he has a DNR, and if they know his lungs are shot, and if they don't believe his heart will sustain him, WHY are they keeping him on the vent???? My brother says its because they would like to try to get him to breathe on an O2 tube. But my Dad doesn't want this. I KNOW he doesn't. He and I have had this conversation many, many, MANY times in the past. I don't want him to die, but I don't want him to suffer, and everything they are saying seems to indicate that he may come off the vent and survive briefly on the O2 tube, but his heart and lungs are going to fail him, no matter what. I just don't get it. And I'm sitting here, 600 miles away, unable to travel, unable to hold his hand or stroke his hair or sing to him to soothe him or to speak with him to hear what he really wants them to do. Ugh. I hate this. I just hate it. I am heartbroken for him and so worried that he will suffer. I don't want him to gasp for his last breaths and suffer pain as he experiences heart failure. I don't want him to be afraid as he lay there dying. (Although I guess all of that is going to happen eventually, huh?) This is just SO not what he wants, and yet it seems no one is respecting his living will, and nobody has the answers. What IS this? Ugh! I know... I'm sure they must just be following protocol. I need to take a breath. I'm sorry. Thank you for letting me vent.
I just pray that he will pass in his coma/sleep - a merciful, peaceful transition home. It's just SO frustrating. I'm sure they know what they're doing and that God is monitoring the situation. It just stinks.
Please just pray for him and that the doctors receive extreme wisdom and exercise extreme care in all matters concerning him. That's the best anyone can do right now.
Wah... Okay. Done whining. It's going to be fine. I'm fine. Thanks so much for letting me get that off of my chest.
Hugs and love -
Nini
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Hi girls -
So much has happened, but instead of going into detail, here's the abbreviated version: My stepmother had a small stroke a few days ago which left her very weak on her left side. As a result, she is unable to care for my Dad any longer by herself, and he was moved - under GREAT protest by him - to a nursing home. Earlier this evening my brother spoke with her. She is on heavy medications, so she was slurring and not very clear, but from what my brother could gather, Dad was admitted into an ICU early this morning. He has refused all therapy. She said his arteries were failing, they had placed a stent in his neck (but we're not sure why?), he is now on a ventilator and in a medically induced coma. They are going to pull the vent tomorrow afternoon, but she has a DNR order so that if his heart doesn't carry him at that time, they will allow him to pass. <Sigh>
My dad has really been suffering for a very, very long time now, as has my stepmother. I believe with all my heart that if it is in fact his time, this is all a result of God's Loving Mercy and in His Perfect Timing. Please pray for him to have a peaceful transition
Home, and that he will revel in the Love of God and His Marvelous Light for all Eternity. Please also pray that my stepmother receive healing, as well as abiding peace, comfort and consolation during all of this. She has been through so much. They both have.
Thank you so much, as always, for your love and prayers. You are all such a blessing to me. And know that I'm okay, honest.
Hugs -
Nini
Farmgirl Sister #1974
God gave us two hands... one to help ourselves, and one to help others!
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| 25 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| Ninibini |
Posted - Jan 04 2015 : 09:02:17 AM
Thanks so much, Bonnie. :) Hugs and blessings to you, sister! - Nini
Farmgirl Sister #1974
God gave us two hands... one to help ourselves, and one to help others!
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| Bonnie Ellis |
Posted - Jan 03 2015 : 11:52:31 AM
Nini: I am so very sorry about your dad. Such a bad time to lose someone. God bless you. Love, Bonnie
grandmother and orphan farmgirl |
| Ninibini |
Posted - Jan 03 2015 : 11:43:14 AM
Awww... Thank you, girls. I'll tell you, nothing really does prepare you for this. I've been feeling so heavy and so "pulled under" these past few days. I guess it's a bit of depression. Can't sleep, don't feel like eating, don't feel like doing anything really; I just feel all achy and blase. If I could sleep it all away, I would; but, as you know, life's duties call. In some ways, having to keep busy is truly a blessing. The hardest part, I think, is that there is no real closure - no wake, no funeral. So indescribably weird, yet very practical, as he wanted. It kind of leaves me feeling like I'm hanging off the edge of a cliff or something, though - I can't really put it into words. It's just so different. Nobody sharing stories, no communion of hearts, no real sense of comfort at all... It's just... Weird... And empty. And because of the holidays, it has taken for-e-ver for the final arrangements to be completed, which somehow makes it that much worse. As he is a veteran of the Navy, my stepmother was able to arrange for his interment on Monday or Tuesday at Massachusetts National Cemetery, where there will be a few words spoken and the playing of "Taps." I am truly grateful. She has also graciously offered his flag to my brother, which means so much me and my siblings. I know for a fact my dad would've wanted my brother to have it. He would be very happy, indeed. And my neighbor, being the truly loving father figure that he is, is making arrangements for a Mass to be held at our Church in his memory. Other than that, it's as if he was here one day and then isn't here anymore. Just so... WEIRD. Did I mention how weird this is?
Anyhow, I want to thank all of you for your words of comfort and support, and for the lovely cards I have received. I am always amazed by the wonderful outpouring of love as we farmgirls rise to these difficult occasions. To be the recipient is an absolutely breathtaking experience. I feel the love, and truly feel lifted up by your prayers. God bless you! Thank you!
Our sister Teri, aka kysheeplady, shared some very comforting words that I hope might also help some of you who are also experiencing the loss of a loved one. She said:
"I think Helen Keller said it best. 'What we have once enjoyed we can never lose. All that we love deeply becomes part of us.'"
Amen, sister. Amen! Thank you! Thank ALL of you!
Hugs and love to all -
Nini
Farmgirl Sister #1974
God gave us two hands... one to help ourselves, and one to help others!
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| wooliespinner |
Posted - Jan 02 2015 : 3:56:58 PM
Nini I am so sorry about losing your sweet father. I have not been on Maryjanes for quite awhile due to sickness and family at my house.
I lost my father 12 years ago and its a hard one for sure.......I still miss him but the good times now are what I remember best.I can smile now when I remember him when I use to cry. Time helps us deal with loss. Praying for you girlfriend and your family.Big hugs to you and yours.
Linda
Raspberry Run Farm
Nubian Dairy Goats |
| wildflower17 |
Posted - Jan 01 2015 : 4:13:17 PM
Nini...So sorry about your loss...I lost my mom in January of 1983 and my dad in June 2002...The hardest 2 things I ever faced...but God will never leave you nor forsake you and will see you through all your heartache...You are in our thoughts and prayers...
Hugs!
Judy
"Until one has loved an animal, a part of one's soul remains unawakened"...
"Country Girl at Heart...Blessed Beyond Measure"!!!
Farm Girl #5440
Farm Girl of The Month September 2013 |
| Bear5 |
Posted - Jan 01 2015 : 1:23:19 PM
Nini, I am so sorry for your loss. I'll be praying for you, your dad, and your family. Hugs to you.
Marly
"It's only when we truly know and understand that we have a limited time on earth- and that we have no way of knowing when our time is up- that we will begin to live each day to the fullest, as if it was the only one we had." Elisabeth Kurler-Ross |
| Ninibini |
Posted - Jan 01 2015 : 10:41:43 AM
Thank you for your prayers and friendship, girls. You all mean so much to me!
Sharon, I know you're ALWAYS here for me. You are such a blessing! I hope you know I'm always here for you, too. :)
Cindy, I know... I thought I was prepared; I thought I could handle it; but I don't think there is any way we can ever be prepared. There is no experience like it. I pray your parents live forever, and that every moment shared becomes a treasured gift!
Hugs and love -
Nini
Farmgirl Sister #1974
God gave us two hands... one to help ourselves, and one to help others!
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| prariehawk |
Posted - Dec 31 2014 : 5:29:09 PM
So sorry. I dread the day one of my parents pass. Praying for peace and know that he's now with God.
Cindy
"Come by the hills to the land where fancy is free; And stand where the peaks meet the sky and the rocks reach the sea.Where the rivers run clear and the bracken is gold in the sun. and cares of tomorrow must wait till this day is done"--Loreena McKennit
"In many ways, you don't just live in the country, it lives inside you"--Ellen Eilers
Visit my blog at http://www.farmerinthebelle.blogspot.com/ |
| Calicogirl |
Posted - Dec 31 2014 : 2:56:25 PM
I wish we could get together Nini so I could be there for you.
Farmgirl Sister #5392
By His Grace, For His Glory
~Sharon
http://amerryheartjournal.blogspot.com/
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| Ninibini |
Posted - Dec 31 2014 : 10:50:25 AM
Thank you all so much, truly. Your prayers and kindness have truly been a great blessing to me and my family. Love you all dearly - Nini
Farmgirl Sister #1974
God gave us two hands... one to help ourselves, and one to help others!
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| ptroupe |
Posted - Dec 30 2014 : 06:43:09 AM
Nini, I am so sorry. May God's peace be with you. My dad got a little better right before he died, too. I think that happens quite often. Why I do not know...only God does. Prayers for you and your family.
Hugs,
Portia
Wishing for the country life! |
| sherone_13 |
Posted - Dec 30 2014 : 06:00:18 AM
Nini.....my heart is with you. As you know, my Daddy went home in November. Maybe they are sharing a cup of Joe. :)
Sherone
Farmgirl Sister #1682
My Blog
www.annapearlsattic.blogspot.com
My Etsy
www.etsy.com/shop/annapearlsattic
Women are angels. When someone breaks our wings, we just jump on our broomsticks and fly! We are flexible that way! |
| crafter |
Posted - Dec 30 2014 : 01:53:08 AM
Nini- Sending my deepest sympathy, love and prayers to you and your family. Peace to you and yours knowing that your dad is wrap in HIS ever loving arms. I am truly sorry for your loss.
Lori
God has promised strength for the day, rest for the labor, light for the way, grace for the trials, help from above, unfailing sympathy and undying love.
We are here to love each other, serve each other and uplift each other. |
| Red Tractor Girl |
Posted - Dec 29 2014 : 11:46:42 PM
I just read your update, Nini. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
Winnie #3109
Red Tractor Girl
Farm Sister of the Year 2014 |
| melody |
Posted - Dec 29 2014 : 8:47:44 PM
My thoughts are with you Nini....
Melody |
| beekeepersgirl |
Posted - Dec 29 2014 : 3:04:16 PM
Nini - I've been away for a while, so just finally saw this post. I am so sorry for your loss and will pray for you and your family.
Hugs,
Luanne
beekeepersgirl #691
Pleasant words are as an honeycomb, sweet to the soul, and health to the bones.
My blog: finallyafarmgirl.blogspot.com
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| ceejay48 |
Posted - Dec 29 2014 : 1:16:11 PM
Nini,
I received your email and responded, but, again, I want to say I'm sooooo sorry! It's hard to go through losing our parents (both of mine and my in-laws are gone) but it's comforting to know their suffering is over!
I'm praying for you and your family for God's comfort, strength, encouragement and love!
LOVE YOU!
CJ
..from the barefoot farmgirl in SW Colorado...sister chick #665.
2010 Farmgirl Sister of the Year
Mother Hen: FARMGIRLS SOUTHWEST HENHOUSE
my aprons - http://www.facebook.com/FarmFreshAprons
living life - www.snippetscja.blogspot.com
from my heart - www.fromacelticheart.blogspot.com
from my hubby - www.aspenforge.blogspot.com |
| MaryJane |
Posted - Dec 29 2014 : 06:03:35 AM
Like the poet/farmer Wendell Berry said, "After long striving, perfect ease." Blessings to you and your family, Nini.
MaryJane, Farmgirl #1 Plowin' Thru ~ giving aprons a good wrap for 45 years and counting ~
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| YellowRose |
Posted - Dec 29 2014 : 05:17:16 AM
Nini, may the Lord cover you and your step-mother in peace and his grace.
Sara
Walk in Peace - Live with Joy
FarmGirl Sister #6034 Aug 25, 2014 |
| cajungal |
Posted - Dec 29 2014 : 05:09:30 AM
I'm praying for you and your family.
Catherine
Sister #76 (2005)
One of the best compliments from one of my daughters: "Moma, you smell good...like dirt.
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| star-schipp |
Posted - Dec 29 2014 : 04:20:13 AM
Nini, I'm sending prayers too. (Hugs)
If you can't feed one hundred people, then just feed one. -Mother Teresa
Star - farmgirl sister #1927
Estle Schipp Farm: Celebrate the Hobby Farm Lifestyle
http://EstleSchippFarm.blogspot.com
https://youngliving.org/starschipp
Master Food Preserver
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| darlenelovesart |
Posted - Dec 28 2014 : 8:14:34 PM
Oh Nini,
My prayers go with you and your Step mom, I know you are at peace for your Dad but it is hard anyway, and prayers for comfort and strength for you both at this time.
Blessings and love and many hugs
darlene
I have learned that to have a good friend is the purest of all God's gifts, for it is a love that has no exchange of payment.
by Frances Farmer
Just follow God unquestioningly.
Because you love Him so, for if you trust His judgment there is nothing you need to know.
I trust in you Jesus... |
| hudsonsinaf |
Posted - Dec 28 2014 : 6:20:38 PM
Many (((hugs))) and loads of prayers!
~ Shannon
http://hudson-everydayblessings.blogspot.com/ |
| hudsonsinaf |
Posted - Dec 28 2014 : 1:39:51 PM
Continuing to pray here as well!
~ Shannon
http://hudson-everydayblessings.blogspot.com/ |
| Killarney |
Posted - Dec 28 2014 : 1:22:25 PM
Nini, continued prayers for your dad and all your family. Big Hug!!
Connie
Imagine....#3392 |
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