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C.W.
True Blue Farmgirl

101 Posts

Chelsea
Prosser WA
USA
101 Posts

Posted - May 13 2009 :  1:56:51 PM  Show Profile
I was just thinking ladies, why is this our problem anyways? Men are the ones with the 'visual' issues. Maybe we should just force them to walk around blind folded and we can wear whatever we want!
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yarnmamma
True Blue Farmgirl

4247 Posts

Linda
Clarks Summit PA
USA
4247 Posts

Posted - May 13 2009 :  2:11:30 PM  Show Profile  Send yarnmamma a Yahoo! Message
Thanks Ruth, for reminding us what the topic is!

Linda
in Scranton, PA
farmgirl #71

We all get heavier as we get older, because there's a lot more information in our heads. That's my story and I'm sticking to it. (author unknown)

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Prairie Princess
True Blue Farmgirl

1075 Posts

Jodi
Washington
USA
1075 Posts

Posted - May 13 2009 :  4:48:51 PM  Show Profile
I've only read the first couple and last couple pages of this thread...so ignore me if this has already been posed...but thinking of ""modesty""...how do you feel when your husband has his attention grabbed by a perhaps ""unmodestly"" dressed woman...when you're present, even?? Guys are visual, hormonally driven...and they DO take second glances. But how does it make you feel...really...?

I know I'm not particularly fond of having to grab my man by the shoulders and direct his attention back my way if I wish to continue a conversation with him...when we're in public and some scantily clad female walks by....

So I try to dress in a way that respects my sisters...in a way that would be respectful to one of YOU if I were to meet you out and about and you had your husband present.

Not frumpy...doesn't have to be unstylish...just...respectful.

Just a thought. :) :)

~Jodi

"Women are like teabags...you never know how strong they are until they get into hot water." Eleanor Roosevelt

www.jodielyzabeth.blogspot.com
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Prairie Princess
True Blue Farmgirl

1075 Posts

Jodi
Washington
USA
1075 Posts

Posted - May 13 2009 :  4:50:06 PM  Show Profile
I guess perhaps it's not catering to the MALE side of the modesty issue...but respecting our fellow girls. :)

~Jodi

"Women are like teabags...you never know how strong they are until they get into hot water." Eleanor Roosevelt

www.jodielyzabeth.blogspot.com
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MagnoliaWhisper
True Blue Farmgirl

2817 Posts

Heather
Haysville Kansas
USA
2817 Posts

Posted - May 13 2009 :  5:45:37 PM  Show Profile
Very true Theresa and Rae.

I was hoping I wouldn't offend any one.

I think every one has a right to choose what to wear. :)

But, just wanted to be clear, I'm not modest because I am ashamed, or embarrassed, or uncomfortable with my body. Really, I think it's quite the opposite. It has more to do with our faith then with my comfort with my body.

And I highly believe what I've read in Ed Wheat's books, I'm totally open with my husband, when it comes to my body. And that's just how my personal faith is. I believe God did make us to be attracted to the opposite sex's bodies. :) But, at the same time....only really for that person we have married to have that privilege.

But, I want to make it clear, I don't judge others who have other belief's. It's just my personal ones for myself. :)


http://www.heathersprairie.blogspot.com
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MagnoliaWhisper
True Blue Farmgirl

2817 Posts

Heather
Haysville Kansas
USA
2817 Posts

Posted - May 13 2009 :  5:58:16 PM  Show Profile
Hmmm, I just got caught up on all the pages! Sorry about that.

Dawn, I am very sorry if you feel I am judging you in any way! I don't judge any one. However, I must say washer girl was pretty funny and it just always sticks out in my head.

I very PERSONALLY know what kind of baggage has to be dumped to lose weight-I've lost 100 lbs in the last 6 years ago. Thankfully because of going through my mental baggage this time, I've been able to keep it off.

Wearing fitted clothing (not tight, but not tents) has helped my self esteem a little. But, mainly self esteem has come from the inside and not much to do with the outside at all.

However, I too was mainly talking tongue and cheek, and even said specifically I wasn't talking about you personally, cause I don't even know what you look like! I was just talking about the variety of people I see around me! lol :) And it's usually my husband saying oh that does NOT look good on that person, before I even think about it really.

And I'm talking about EXTREME things we've seen. lol We don't nit pick by any means, we got better things to do with out time. lol haha It's only about the things like Washer bikini girl, that's hard to ignore! lol hahaha Or once, I still remember seeing some one dressed fully in trash bags for the rain-a hat, a coat, and booties-all made from black trash bags! lol That was funny, and they were completely covered! lol hahaha


http://www.heathersprairie.blogspot.com
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Old Spirit
True Blue Farmgirl

1496 Posts

Rae
MN
1496 Posts

Posted - May 13 2009 :  6:33:59 PM  Show Profile
The certainly did get interesting. I agree with Heather though and what God says but that is my faith and my belief. I look at it as respect for myself, my husband and family as well as other wives. There is too much temptation out there and there are women who don't care if a man is married or not :-( WOW Heather way to go 100 lbs. What did you do? I really need to lose some weight and wtih our farm starting up I hope that helps as it is a dream for us. I am such an emotional eater!!!
Rae

...those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles:...
Isaiah 40:31
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kissmekate
True Blue Farmgirl

890 Posts

Kate
Delano Minnesota
890 Posts

Posted - May 13 2009 :  7:15:31 PM  Show Profile
I certainly hope everyone takes a deep breath and doesn't do anything rash. The intention of this thread wasn't to hurt anyones feelings. I started it to have a discussion on modesty related issues.

The great thing about America, is we are all entitled to our own opinions.

Personally, for me I was trying to get a feel of what everyone wears and considers as "modest."
OK and to vent a little bit about the trashy clothes out there for girls.

Let's everyone please get along, or I'll ask to have the thread deleted.


Don't miss out on a blessing, just because it isn't packaged the way you expected. ~MaryJo Copeland

Edited by - kissmekate on May 13 2009 7:18:21 PM
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C.W.
True Blue Farmgirl

101 Posts

Chelsea
Prosser WA
USA
101 Posts

Posted - May 13 2009 :  9:03:34 PM  Show Profile
As we have noticed the changes within little girls clothing, I have to say that some of the new trends for women I love. Like how long all the shirts are now, and leggings under skirts and dresses.
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kissmekate
True Blue Farmgirl

890 Posts

Kate
Delano Minnesota
890 Posts

Posted - May 13 2009 :  9:32:33 PM  Show Profile
As the mother of a teenage girl (next week she turns 13, Lord have mercy!) the shirts can't be long enough! LOL

Don't miss out on a blessing, just because it isn't packaged the way you expected. ~MaryJo Copeland
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Old Spirit
True Blue Farmgirl

1496 Posts

Rae
MN
1496 Posts

Posted - May 14 2009 :  03:31:11 AM  Show Profile
Good luck Kate!!! My youngest go done with college yesterday, YIIIPPPPEEEEE! I just wish the young girls would realize what they look like. The little little ones is what really upsets me.
Rae

...those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles:...
Isaiah 40:31
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Old Spirit
True Blue Farmgirl

1496 Posts

Rae
MN
1496 Posts

Posted - May 14 2009 :  03:32:12 AM  Show Profile
OOOPPS got done with college not go done :-)
Rae

...those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles:...
Isaiah 40:31
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yarnmamma
True Blue Farmgirl

4247 Posts

Linda
Clarks Summit PA
USA
4247 Posts

Posted - May 14 2009 :  05:52:38 AM  Show Profile  Send yarnmamma a Yahoo! Message
I like long dresses/skirts too. The can be cooler than shorts in the summer and modest. Because I sew I see that the patterns in the pattern books are very modest.
I also like the leggings or tights under the short dresses....worn like tunics. They are really cute.
I'm in the mood to sew! :-)

Linda
in Scranton, PA
farmgirl #71

We all get heavier as we get older, because there's a lot more information in our heads. That's my story and I'm sticking to it. (author unknown)

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LauriP
True Blue Farmgirl

239 Posts

Laurianne
Hertford North Carolina
USA
239 Posts

Posted - May 14 2009 :  09:14:34 AM  Show Profile
yeah -- what I wear should never Evah make somebody else unhappy -- or how I think somebody in a business environment should be dressed. That's their thing. I just felt it was a little over the top for some of my co-workers to be a little too revealing. Tha's all.

I'm always a t-shirt person. Sweat pants during the winter. But summer I try to buy some decent peasant blouse patterns, or basic camp shirt patterns. Just something to make me comfy. I've lost weight, an' tho sure, I'd like to dress how I did wayyy back in the day..ha! -- That aint gonna happen. I'd probably have to try and hold my breath so my stomach wouldn't pooch out all over...an' then I'd have to figure out how to keep these legs from not lookin' so flabby...Blah with it all. I just wear some good ol' shorts from the mens dept. at Kmart -- sweats usually. And their usually less than womens!!

Pleeeze don' anyone get fired up over this thread!! When somebody has a weight loss, then they absolutely should dress how they feel comfortable. They are a new person. And they should show how their self esteem has jumped over the moon.


But for now, I'm goin' out to the laundry room to get some more paint, an' get noahs closets painted. We're almost done with the cabin!! Woo-Hoo!!

Laurianne
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MagnoliaWhisper
True Blue Farmgirl

2817 Posts

Heather
Haysville Kansas
USA
2817 Posts

Posted - May 14 2009 :  1:30:04 PM  Show Profile
I did lol, don't laugh, Richard Simmons Food Mover system. It's basically the diabetic exchanges. And used Healthy Exchanges recipes a lot because they had the diabetic exchanges listed. :) It worked. :)

And yes, I didn't think or even know that anything we were saying was upsetting.......I sure didn't mean for it to sound in any negative way at all. :)


http://www.heathersprairie.blogspot.com
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KansasCowgirrrl
Farmgirl in Training

26 Posts

Lisa
Linn Valley KS
USA
26 Posts

Posted - May 29 2009 :  6:47:46 PM  Show Profile  Send KansasCowgirrrl a Yahoo! Message
I skimmed through all the posts on modest dressing. I think peoples' opinions of modest dress vary widely as we can see here. I consider my clothing modest, in that I'm not hanging out for the world to see. I read a quote many years ago, though I can't remember from who off the top of my head...a gentleman pointed out "If a gal doesn't want to be treated like a hooker, she should take the for sale sign off the porch!" This was in response to some gal complaining that men didn't treat her with respect even though she dressed very suggestively.

My daughter just turned 11 but is already hitting puberty. I'm pretty strict with how tight, short or skimpy her clothes are. I don't even allow things in her wardrobe that I don't approve of. Yes, she has shorts, tank tops, etc., but her belly doesn't show, her booty doesn't show, you can't see through any of it!

I love to dress up and have always been a clothes horse. But you can dress with style and not look like a frump. Now that I'm larger than when I was younger (16 instead of 3), I buy a lot of my tops from Lane Bryant. They are very flattering for gals with larger bustlines. Soft silky fabrics in lovely colors are flattering to any size and clothing that fits properly (not hanging like a bag or so tight leaving nothing to the imagination) is the way to go!

Cowgirrrl Lisa, Farmgirl #596
A cowgirl is a woman with guts and a horse
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MagnoliaWhisper
True Blue Farmgirl

2817 Posts

Heather
Haysville Kansas
USA
2817 Posts

Posted - May 31 2009 :  2:48:44 PM  Show Profile
Yes exactly Lisa.

BTW, I can't wait to get back to Kansas. lol Wish it was as simple as clicking my heels! UHG!


http://www.heathersprairie.blogspot.com
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RedHoopWoman
True Blue Farmgirl

513 Posts

Kathryn
Yoder Colorado
USA
513 Posts

Posted - Jun 01 2009 :  7:57:52 PM  Show Profile
I have to say that the whole time I've been reading through this thread,I was hearing Hank Williams Junior singing "I like my women just a little on the trashy side.."sorry,I couldn't resist,wow,I've read through most of the posts here and that's the only word I can start with is WOW!
I don't want to offend anyone but I can't help but throw my hat in the ring in this discussion and say a few things,it's such a multifaceted issue that it would be impossible to say all that I would like to say or address everything but most importantly,regardless of how a teen or anyone pre-pubescent might dress,a grown man or adult of either sex looking at them and seeing something sexy is WRONG!!!!
There is no grey material there,if someone is looking at a five year old playing in the park in a pair of shorts,I don't care how short,and seeing something sexy it is wrong and that's one thing that needs to be put into perspective here,there's nothing wrong with little kids wearing short shorts or a baby in a two piece swimming suit because they're children,they're innocent and sweet,there should be no thoughts of sexy factor in relation to little kids,that's all I have to say about that.
One thing I find shocking is the willingness of some women to shoot such demeaning terms against one another,using words like trashy,skanky,slutty,etc...or worse to label other women,we should be sisters and encouraging and supporting eachother and thier differences in dress or opinion,we should not participate in the suppression of other women by using such patriarchally suppressing (and downright catty) terms against eachother,every woman has the right to express themselves the way that they choose,it really all boils down to taste,culture,religion,etc..I try very hard not to push my sensibilities on someone else because if I tell someone else how they should live thier lives then they can tell me how I should live mine and that's what leads to butting heads,I really believe in "live and let live".
As far as my Husband looking at other women who might be dressed sexy,I don't lose sleep about that,I have alot of confidence in myself,my marriage and most importantly in my Husband.
Men are not mindless and driven purely by hormones,to think of them that way is also demeaning to men,if a man is going to cheat on his marriage it is due to a lack of integrity and a severe character flaw on his part,not by how women "dress and entice" them,they are making a choice to do something they know is morally wrong,no manner of dress can influence a man with integrity to turn his back on his marriage if he is not so inclined already.
It's almost the same as accusing a woman who was sexually assaulted of "asking for it" because of her manner of dress or her conduct,it is taking the responsibility from the perpetrator and placing it on the victim.
Years ago,there was a Middle Eastern town with a high incidence of sexual assaults on women,thier solution was to put a curfew on women to "keep them safe",well,women's rights activists countered that there should be a curfew on the MEN rather than the women and rightfully so.
I might be sticking my face in the beehive here and I don't want to argue with anyone,I just feel compelled to put a couple things into perspective here,I respect other's opinions here but please,don't judge your sisters and use such terrible words against other women,it only sets us back,we should be moving forward united.
Sure,when I see a young girl dressed sexy and looking for male attention,I see a girl who hasn't quite developed her own sense of self and may be looking for attention or suffering low self esteem,I think what a shame,she should be looking forward to something better and that all begins in the home,with their parents influencing them through positive direction,if we do our part and raise strong little girls then no Bratz doll,Britney Spears,etc..is going to influence them,not if we get to them first!!!
On another note,as long as a woman dresses appropriate to the occasion,I don't care what she wears but what I think is funny is something my brother said to me,he wondered why it was that some women wear these sexy outfits or revealing tops and then get offended when men look at them,if they're going to wear it,they should be prepared to be seen!
Anyways,I respect how you all feel and forgive me if what I had to say might have offended you,you have a right to feel the way you do and I have a right to feel the way I do,I just had to throw my hat in the ring!!!



"Today's Mighty Oak is just Yesterday's Nut"
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yarnmamma
True Blue Farmgirl

4247 Posts

Linda
Clarks Summit PA
USA
4247 Posts

Posted - Jun 02 2009 :  12:05:27 AM  Show Profile  Send yarnmamma a Yahoo! Message
Kathryn,
Very well said. I agree with ya.
I did want to say that I meant that men are distracted by the girls who are developed and look older. The stage where ya cant tell age very well. Not the tiny girls

Linda
in Scranton, PA
farmgirl #71

"WELL BEHAVED WOMEN RARELY MAKE HISTORY"

(The Junk Gypsy)
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Old Spirit
True Blue Farmgirl

1496 Posts

Rae
MN
1496 Posts

Posted - Jun 02 2009 :  05:03:45 AM  Show Profile
Just a thought, why do women, in general, dress how we do? Now to try use the right words... I am talking about the low cut, too tight kinds of things. Do we really feel good, society says we need to....
Rae

...those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles:...
Isaiah 40:31
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yarnmamma
True Blue Farmgirl

4247 Posts

Linda
Clarks Summit PA
USA
4247 Posts

Posted - Jun 02 2009 :  05:19:23 AM  Show Profile  Send yarnmamma a Yahoo! Message
Here is an example.
A person I had not met before was walking by my house with someone that I do know. The younger lady had large breasts and such a low cut and tight shirt that more was showing than was covered...lots of cleavage. She was talking about something she would do if kids started throwing rocks near her. My response was as adults we can't do that...and the lady I do know said as they walked away "she's not an adult...she young...she's a child". I know that she meant she is underage and actually was a child-legally. This is one of the points we were making about current society. ....I thought she was a grown woman but she wasn't!

Linda
in Scranton, PA
farmgirl #71

"WELL BEHAVED WOMEN RARELY MAKE HISTORY"

(The Junk Gypsy)

Edited by - yarnmamma on Jun 02 2009 05:22:19 AM
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yarnmamma
True Blue Farmgirl

4247 Posts

Linda
Clarks Summit PA
USA
4247 Posts

Posted - Jun 02 2009 :  05:21:05 AM  Show Profile  Send yarnmamma a Yahoo! Message



Edited by - yarnmamma on Jun 02 2009 05:21:51 AM
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MagnoliaWhisper
True Blue Farmgirl

2817 Posts

Heather
Haysville Kansas
USA
2817 Posts

Posted - Jun 02 2009 :  05:51:34 AM  Show Profile
I didn't call any one names, nor would I. That's not in my personality.

I agree, when I see some one dressed like that my automatic assumption is the person has low self esteem. And that was EXACTLY my point. I have good self esteem, and that's why I dress modestly....I don't need to dress a certain way to boost my self esteem that comes from the inside, no matter what you where it won't change your self esteem. If so it wouldn't last it would only be temporary.

I agree no one should look at a child and think "sexy". Sadly though pedophiles do! And there's sadly more then you would ever imagine out there. But, I'm extreme no doubt about that, when it comes to my child's safety and these types! I have my own issues with them...which sadly for my daughter makes me a bit over protective with her. IE she will probably never spend the night at a friend's home.......as I was molested most my life by my best friend's father...who later murdered her. But, again....my own issues.


http://www.heathersprairie.blogspot.com
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Old Spirit
True Blue Farmgirl

1496 Posts

Rae
MN
1496 Posts

Posted - Jun 02 2009 :  06:17:40 AM  Show Profile
I have learned with life too that I don't need to prove myself. I don't mean to offend anyone but I respect myself and don't need to be showing.
Rae

...those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles:...
Isaiah 40:31
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Old Spirit
True Blue Farmgirl

1496 Posts

Rae
MN
1496 Posts

Posted - Jun 02 2009 :  06:19:05 AM  Show Profile
OOOPS Heather I am so sorry to hear what you have gone through. I don't think all the crap on TV and magazines helps the situation either.
Rae

...those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles:...
Isaiah 40:31
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