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Across the Fence:  Let's Laugh Our Way Through 2015!!  |
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Cindy Lou
True Blue Farmgirl
2325 Posts
Susan
Lonsdale
MN
USA
2325 Posts |
 Posted - Dec 02 2014 : 1:47:12 PM
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It was so cold . . .
we had to stop eating with metal cutlery. Some people walked around for days with spoons or forks stuck to their tongues!
It was so cold...
hitchhikers were holding up pictures of thumbs!
It was so cold...
roosters were rushing into Kentucky Fried Chicken and begging to use the pressure cooker!
It was so cold . . .
when I dialed 911, a recorded message said to phone back in the spring!
It was so cold . . .
the optician was giving away free ice scrapers with every new pair of eyeglasses!
Do you have any to add?
Susan
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?"
Mary Oliver |
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prariehawk
True Blue Farmgirl
2914 Posts
Cindy
2914 Posts |
Posted - Dec 02 2014 : 6:55:52 PM
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It was so cold---
cows were giving milkshakes
It was so cold--
the icicles were shivering
It was so cold--
the devil had to buy a pair of ice skates
Cindy
"Come by the hills to the land where fancy is free; And stand where the peaks meet the sky and the rocks reach the sea.Where the rivers run clear and the bracken is gold in the sun. and cares of tomorrow must wait till this day is done"--Loreena McKennit
"In many ways, you don't just live in the country, it lives inside you"--Ellen Eilers
Visit my blog at http://www.farmerinthebelle.blogspot.com/ |
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churunga
True Blue Farmgirl
3919 Posts
Marie
Minneapolis
MN
USA
3919 Posts |
Posted - Dec 02 2014 : 7:44:38 PM
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It is so cold--
my nose hairs are freezing.
Marie, Sister #5142
Farmgirl of the Month May 2014
Try everything once and the fun things twice. |
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Bear5
True Blue Farmgirl
13055 Posts
Louisiana/Texas
USA
13055 Posts |
Posted - Dec 08 2014 : 4:11:13 PM
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It was so humid yesterday- my hair looked like a wet q-tip. Really!
LOL
Marly
"It's only when we truly know and understand that we have a limited time on earth- and that we have no way of knowing when our time is up- that we will begin to live each day to the fullest, as if it was the only one we had." Elisabeth Kurler-Ross |
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csmartyonline
True Blue Farmgirl
247 Posts
Carole
Clarksville
TN
USA
247 Posts |
Posted - Dec 23 2014 : 07:59:18 AM
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What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator.
Yuk, Yuk. |
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Calicogirl
True Blue Farmgirl
5216 Posts
Sharon
Bruce Crossing
Michigan
USA
5216 Posts |
Posted - Dec 31 2014 : 2:45:00 PM
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Not sure where I heard this one:
A blond man was calling 911 as his wife was beginning labor.
"My wife is having contractions, they are 2 minutes apart!"
"Is this your wife's firstborn?"
"No, this is her husband!"
Farmgirl Sister #5392
By His Grace, For His Glory
~Sharon
http://amerryheartjournal.blogspot.com/
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Edited by - Calicogirl on Dec 31 2014 2:45:30 PM |
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Cindy Lou
True Blue Farmgirl
2325 Posts
Susan
Lonsdale
MN
USA
2325 Posts |
Posted - Jan 12 2015 : 4:22:34 PM
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Susan
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?"
Mary Oliver |
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katmom
True Blue Farmgirl
17040 Posts
Grace
WACAL Gal
WashCalif.
USA
17040 Posts |
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Ninibini
True Blue Farmgirl
7577 Posts
Nini
Pennsylvania
USA
7577 Posts |
Posted - Jan 13 2015 : 3:21:57 PM
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LOL! SUSAN! That took me a while!!! LOL! Love it!
Oh my gosh... Been out of the loop lately! Just scrolling back through the posts and cracking up! Thank you, girls! Let's keep this one rolling... I'm updating our link's title to 2015 right now!!!!
(Sharon - I sure appreciate a blonde MAN joke for a change! LOL!)
Hugs -
Nini
Farmgirl Sister #1974
God gave us two hands... one to help ourselves, and one to help others!
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Cindy Lou
True Blue Farmgirl
2325 Posts
Susan
Lonsdale
MN
USA
2325 Posts |
Posted - Jan 22 2015 : 4:57:13 PM
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A blond man was driving home, drunk as a skunk. Suddenly he has to swerve to avoid a tree, then another, then another. A cop car pulls him over, so he tells the cop about all the trees in the road.
The cop says, “That ‘s your air freshener swinging about!”
Susan
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?"
Mary Oliver |
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Cindy Lou
True Blue Farmgirl
2325 Posts
Susan
Lonsdale
MN
USA
2325 Posts |
Posted - Jan 24 2015 : 4:18:20 PM
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Susan
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?"
Mary Oliver |
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Cindy Lou
True Blue Farmgirl
2325 Posts
Susan
Lonsdale
MN
USA
2325 Posts |
Posted - Jan 28 2015 : 08:44:40 AM
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Susan
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?"
Mary Oliver |
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Ninibini
True Blue Farmgirl
7577 Posts
Nini
Pennsylvania
USA
7577 Posts |
Posted - Jan 28 2015 : 09:58:32 AM
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LOL! OOOOOOHMYGOSH, Susan! Those are HILARIOUS!!! Slightly offensive, perhaps, but still... HILARIOUS! I have some friends with whom I am definitely going to share! LOL!
I love the crafter list, too... Funny, but so true!
And the blonde guy joke? PRICELESS!!!
You are a riot - you always post the funniest things! LOVE you, sister! Thank you!
Hugs -
Nini
Farmgirl Sister #1974
God gave us two hands... one to help ourselves, and one to help others!
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Edited by - Ninibini on Jan 28 2015 09:59:47 AM |
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katmom
True Blue Farmgirl
17040 Posts
Grace
WACAL Gal
WashCalif.
USA
17040 Posts |
Posted - Jan 28 2015 : 10:49:50 AM
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lololol! ,, ok, my turn...
* When a cow laughs... does milk come out it's nose?
*How do Hens know how to lay eggs eggzactkly the right size to fit egg cups packages?
*Who was the 1st person who thought that the white thing that came from a hen's butt looked edible?
and last,, but not least...Should farmers scold their chickens because they use... wait for it.... Fowl Language?
snork, giggle..
>^..^<
Happiness is being a katmom and Glamping Diva!
www.katmom4.blogspot.com & http://graciesvictorianrose.blogspot.com
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churunga
True Blue Farmgirl
3919 Posts
Marie
Minneapolis
MN
USA
3919 Posts |
Posted - Jan 28 2015 : 10:53:27 AM
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A man was talking to his wife. He said, "Why are you so beautiful but so stupid?"
She thought for a while and said, "I am beautiful so you would love me. I am stupid so I would love you."
Marie, Sister #5142
Farmgirl of the Month May 2014
Try everything once and the fun things twice. |
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katmom
True Blue Farmgirl
17040 Posts
Grace
WACAL Gal
WashCalif.
USA
17040 Posts |
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Ninibini
True Blue Farmgirl
7577 Posts
Nini
Pennsylvania
USA
7577 Posts |
Posted - Jan 31 2015 : 2:44:24 PM
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Lol! Gracie - You made me snork, giggle, too! REALLY loud! LOL! You know, though... That's a really good point... Who WAS the first person to think that was edible? Good gravy! I'm sure glad they didn't see something come out the horse's butt first! LOL!
Marie - SO true, sister! LOL! SO true! LOL! ;)
Hugs -
Nini
Farmgirl Sister #1974
God gave us two hands... one to help ourselves, and one to help others!
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Calicogirl
True Blue Farmgirl
5216 Posts
Sharon
Bruce Crossing
Michigan
USA
5216 Posts |
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katmom
True Blue Farmgirl
17040 Posts
Grace
WACAL Gal
WashCalif.
USA
17040 Posts |
Posted - Jan 31 2015 : 9:38:22 PM
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things that make you think,,, hmmmmm...
Why don't cows have heart attacks if milk is high in cholesterol?
What was going through the mind of the first person ever to pull on a cow's udder?
ll
>^..^<
Happiness is being a katmom and Glamping Diva!
www.katmom4.blogspot.com & http://graciesvictorianrose.blogspot.com
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katmom
True Blue Farmgirl
17040 Posts
Grace
WACAL Gal
WashCalif.
USA
17040 Posts |
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Ninibini
True Blue Farmgirl
7577 Posts
Nini
Pennsylvania
USA
7577 Posts |
Posted - Feb 09 2015 : 09:43:58 AM
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I heard Bishop Fulton Sheen tell this one yesterday morning on one of his shows from many, many years ago... I had no idea he was such a hoot!
A young boy was being examined by a social worker.
“Tell me about your family,” the counselor requested.
“Well, my father, he’s in prison,” the boy replied. “My mother, she’s in rehab. My brother, well he’s up at Harvard, and… “
“Hold on,” said the counselor. “Your brother is at HARVARD? What is he studying?”
“Oh, nothing!” answered the boy. “They are studying HIM!”
Ba da BAH!
Hugs -
Nini
Farmgirl Sister #1974
God gave us two hands... one to help ourselves, and one to help others!
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Edited by - Ninibini on Feb 09 2015 09:44:28 AM |
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churunga
True Blue Farmgirl
3919 Posts
Marie
Minneapolis
MN
USA
3919 Posts |
Posted - Feb 09 2015 : 5:26:36 PM
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Three old guys were sitting around talking.
The 70 year old said, "I wish I could take a good pee."
The 80 year old said, "I wish I could take a good poop."
The 90 year old said, "At 7:00 every morning, I have a nice pee. At 8:00 every morning, I have a nice poop. At 9:00, I get out of bed."
Marie, Sister #5142
Farmgirl of the Month May 2014
Try everything once and the fun things twice. |
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katmom
True Blue Farmgirl
17040 Posts
Grace
WACAL Gal
WashCalif.
USA
17040 Posts |
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churunga
True Blue Farmgirl
3919 Posts
Marie
Minneapolis
MN
USA
3919 Posts |
Posted - Feb 09 2015 : 6:39:09 PM
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At school all the kids were talking about what their fathers did for a living. Johnny said his dad was a policeman. Mary said her dad was a fireman. Henry said his dad was an exotic dancer. After class, the teacher took Henry aside and asked him about his father. Henry said, "Well, actually my dad is a banjo player but I felt too embarrassed to say so.
Marie, Sister #5142
Farmgirl of the Month May 2014
Try everything once and the fun things twice. |
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Ninibini
True Blue Farmgirl
7577 Posts
Nini
Pennsylvania
USA
7577 Posts |
Posted - Feb 10 2015 : 10:33:36 AM
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Farmgirl Sister #1974
God gave us two hands... one to help ourselves, and one to help others!
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Across the Fence: Let's Laugh Our Way Through 2015!! |
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Let's Laugh Our Way Through 2015!!
